Before the meeting

I have to meet this guy in a couple hours that is a friend of a friend. I’m running out of money. It’s going to cost me probably $15 just to drive my dumbass down to the restaurant on the other side of town. I’m in a coffee shop again and I've got another 4 hours to kill before I meet this guy. Setting up this meeting made me feel like such a fuck. Like I said before, this guy is a friend of friend. The kind of friend of a friend that you have no idea what they look like, how old they are, ect. I feel like I’m on some sort of online meet and greet service while I'm texting this guy. He told me to meet him at this restaurant at a specific time and I told him I was a white male and 23. I asked him “How will I recognize you”. He says, “Asian, I’ll be the only one in the place”. Now that’s funny. Either way, I’ll be able to find him. It would be easier if he was the only person in the place, but that also increases the chances that I go to this place and get shot in the face, right? I can’t say I’d mind an experience like that right now.

This is just dumb and I can’t get over it. I feel like I’m going on a blind date. I could not be more uncomfortable about this. I’m going to be presenting myself as such a pity case to this guy. I’m also going to have to explain to this guy why I’m not eating. Hopefully I can find the right time to casually say that I spent a quarter of my money just to drive to this fucking place. So, what’s going on with me you might ask? I’ll tell you what’s going on. I’m nearly fucking broke, homeless, and have no job- that’s what’s going on. If you ever think about taking your money and “starting over” in a new city, go for it. But just make sure you don’t gamble all your money away when you get there because then you are really starting over. So, yeah, that’s what's going on with me. Anyway, so this guy I’m meeting for lunch is supposed to help me. He’s supposed to be able to give me a job and possibly find me a place to stay. Tomorrow I’ll talk about what it’s like to live out of a 4 door car for 3 weeks. You’d be surprised how little money you can spend if you know how to go about it and if you don’t mind thieving a bit.

Let me go ahead and close this post out by talking about how fucking annoying the music is in this place. Every song has this jazzy 80s twang sound to it. It all seems to be some kind of dance-pop post disco bullshit. What coffee shop owner would play this shit, especially in the morning? I shouldn’t even be writing right now. I’m still really tired from last night. I didn’t sleep much in my car and I’m dreading the lunch with this guy more and more. I really hope he can help me. I’m running out of pills and money, what could be worse?